Are you putting yourself last?

During the week I had a few Discovery calls as usual with women enquiring about our organising services. A common thread popped among these calls that they were putting themselves last. I also had a consultation recently who said the same. And I met a fellow business woman recently and we discussed this very topic. So it has come up quite a bit in the last month. I’ve known for a long time that there is a correlation between clutter and not minding ourselves. However, I’m not sure I realised just how much.

We talk about good food habits, getting exercise and even our financial health. But our environment also impacts us in a big way. I’ve said for many, many years that our home is the place that is there to shelter us, shield us and nurture us. It’s where our most important relationships are. Even if we live alone – the relationship with ourselves is THE most important one, after all.

If we don’t take care of our home, then we are not taking care of ourselves. Pure and simple.

If we don’t take care of our home because “we’re too busy looking after others”, then we are not taking care of ourselves.

Every time we say “yes” to someone else, we say “no” to ourselves.

Most of the time, it might suit us to say “yes” of course. But if your home is being affected because you’re looking after others more than yourself, then you have to examine this.

You may say you’re too busy, but are you?

Or are you choosing this?

Do you not want to look at why your home isn’t the way you hoped?

Do you not want to face it?

Do you find it boring to mind the home?

Are there too many bad reminders of something in it?

Do you feel you don’t deserve a nice home?

When we invest in our home, we’re investing in ourselves. Perhaps you don’t feel worthy of that?

Putting others first may be a form of procrastination also. Someone else is the reason why you don’t have the home you wish for.

By putting others first all the time, you have no energy left to sort out a house. You’re literally burnt out physically and emotionally dealing with others, that you can’t face into the clutter. To make yourself feel better, you might even shop a bit and then more comes in then goes out. It can be a vicious cycle.

If you don’t honour your space, it’ll be hard to honour yourself.

By putting others needs above your own – at scale – we don’t prioritise tasks that would give you peace of mind. Perhaps you feel spending time looking after your home would be selfish and time lost that could be given to helping others.

But why can’t you have both?

Be mindful of fear-based thoughts and scarcity mindsets.

You can help others and take care of yourself.

If you are tired, clutter will only make you worse. When you are helping others, you need all your energy. A cluttered home does nothing but sap and stagnate energy.

Reclaiming your space is one of the first ways that we start reclaiming things for ourselves and our sense of self.

Think about it.

Happy Organising!

Sarah xx

P.S. 💌 If you do decide to declutter, check out our 5 Ways to Keep Decluttering When You Want to Quit here!

P.P.S. 💌 If you don’t want to tackle things alone, at Organised Chaos, we understand that this isn’t just about “stuff.” It’s about support, accountability, and permission — permission to put yourself back on the list. Over the past month alone, I’ve spoken with several women who all echoed the same sentiment: they needed someone to check in, to nudge them forward, to remind them they matter too. That’s what we offer — not just decluttering advice, but compassionate accountability. You just need a system and someone in your corner. And we’re here for that. When you’re ready to reclaim your space — and with it, your sense of self — we’ll walk beside you.